"it's poop again"

i'm in my office in the academic building as i type this. not too long ago i was meeting with a student and changing his major to sociology. i could hear someone in the hallway outside walking around and figured they were either waiting to talk to me next or waiting for him to finish up with me so they could leave together. well, i was wrong about that.

the student leaves, happy to be switched over. i goof around on the internet checking email and to see if i won the texas lottery yet. and then a smell creeps into my office from the hallway. it smells like someone has ripped all kinds of ass. i figure it will dissipate, but it keeps lingering.

then another student pops in and says "have you been out in the hallway?" "no, i explain." and then she informs me that "there's a huge turd out here." "you're kidding, right?" i say. "no," she explains..."it's on the floor...and ew...on the wall too." reluctantly, i peek out the door and there is, in fact, a hefty poop next to one of the chairs at the end of the hall, a bit on the floor, and some smeared on the wall. "how is this possible?" i ask no one, though i'm talking out loud.

so, someone took a dump in the hallway outside (not right outside, but near) my office. it brought me back to my residence hall days (especially at marquette), where it was not uncommon to find or hear about finding bodily functions in the hall, elevator, floor, whatever. one guy in my building at marquette drunkly mistook the elevator for a urinal one night. but this is a academic building...i mean, it's called the academic building for god's sake..not the shit factory building.

i had the joy of calling the main office to inform them that there is poop up here. "poop?" "yes, poop." i shut the door and luckily can't smell it as much, but i did almost gag last time i went out in the hall way to put a yellow caution sign (you know, the wet floor ones) over the poop on the floor.

here's hoping the maintenance guys get here sometime soon. (what a thankless job that is. cleaning up some jerkoffs excrement! there's no way they get paid enough to do that!) it's icky bad and a bit incomprehisble. "i didn't do well on my final so i'm going to go take a shit on a chair?" it is friday the 13th i guess, but damn that's gross!